Today is Brown Sugar’s birthday, and she has three things she must tackle off her to do list: “1. Try out a vibrator to see if I’m broken. 2. Squash all beef with anyone I’ve ever fallen out with. Ever. Including beef with bitches that from pre-k. which means that 3. I guess I have to unblock my father.”

Follow along her birthday journey as she breaks no contact with her ex-situationship, ex-best friend, and ex-father.